Friday, February 25, 2011

They never belong...

Today, I finally sent away the highchair that my toddler does not like to sit on and the swing that she should not still be sitting on to an expectant mother. When my school age boys came home, they did not say anything. When my husband came home, he did not say anything. No one notice anything different. I suppose, those two items never truly belong. They were not missed and our home feel normal without them...

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Is this my ticket to transformation?

I know it will take more than some sudden outburst of getting organized effort to be truly transformed but perhaps, this is what I need to get started, to feel hopeful again, to have surfaces to comfortably work on. All these could make it easier to move forward. 

But most importantly, I like to have an uncluttered desk for undistracted, devoted quiet time. For He is the one who can bring true transformation.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Binge Shopping... I did it again ~sigh~

For most women, clothing, shoes, and bags, may become irresistible when they saw them on sale. For me, stationary is my thing... 

Last night, I saw copy paper, photo paper, pens and sticky pads would be free at the store for 2 days only, I started trying to figure out how I could find the time to go buy them. Perhaps, for any other person, it would be good money management, for it is (have I said it yet?) FREE. But for me, I've already had several reams of paper at home while I know we use less than one in a year. I could not even remember the last time we actually print photo at home. I also have collected several dozens of pens from such shopping years ago. And I have so many sticky pads that you can find one from any corner in my home.

I used to be so proud of myself that I had never been a shopaholic. I always use the same bag until it breaks to get a new one. I always wear the same pair of shoes except the other one for special occasions. Okay, I admit, I do have a few more... a snow boots, 2 dress shoes, and a sandals that is about to break but still not many for a women, right? And my side of clothing is about the same as my husband's sides. The last time I bought new clothing was about 3 years ago. When people say, "shop less and you'll have less mess". I never thought it applies to me.

Then, I saw the Story of Stuff right after I purchased a few pads of college lined paper for 1 cent each. I started to realized that even cheap stuff come with a price... on other people and on the environment. I start to become conscious with my bargain stationary shopping. Then, it became clearer and clearer to me that I "bargain" shop a lot and my home is stuffed with consumables like detergent, soap, shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrushes that we could not use up in the next ten years.

So, for me, it was not good money management. It contributes to my problem. It could even be my entire problem...

I probably will donate the paper to my kids' school. They could put them to good use. But I find the (not even fancy) pens very difficult to let go... 

I have a problem...

Friday, February 18, 2011

In the Beginning

"In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. 
Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, 
and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters" 
Genesis 1:1-2

"Formless", "darkness" and "the surface of the deep" are the words very suitable to describe my home - Most surfaces are "formless" and covered with things. And, so much stuff is living in the "darkness" under my desk, our furniture or inside of the cracks of any kinds. I am also almost certain that there are tax return related documents hiding under "the surface of the deep", or, namely, the pile of paperwork on my desk...

My desk today, Feb 18, 2011
Somewhere (unfortunately, forgot where) I read says in Genesis, when God creates, He pretty much went through an organizing process: He created space (v. 6), He separates (v.4, 6), He gathers (v.9), He labels (v.10) and many times, we read, "according to various kinds" when He put things in. "And God saw that it was good"

The birth of this blog is out of a simple belief, it is God's will for me to change. He is working at it, asking me "are you in?"

It is my believe that this will become a record of His work on me. And I hope it will be a place I can be hold accountable. A place where someone like me could be understood and find hope; where someone living with a messy could see things from a different angle.

As easily distracted as I am, I cannot guarantee that I won't post any of my random thoughts :)